I had huge expectations for 20/20 vision in 2020
Well, where do I begin? I began 2020 with a 40day fast and a strong desire to have a clearer spiritual vision and direction. I wanted that 20/20 vision.
I preached the last Sunday of December 2019 at our church and I preached from Psalm 103 and highlighted verse 12: “as far as the east is from the west so far has he removed our transgressions from us”. We all had pieces of paper that we had written down our regrets from the last year and we burned them right then and there and ended with a beautiful time of worship. It was a great service and everyone left with a sense of a clean slate before God. I love doing stuff like that to help prepare my heart for the New Year.
As we all know 2020 was like a hurricane, an earthquake, and a drought all at once. It was one of my worst years ever. Like everyone else in the globe it was difficult and then for Dwayne and I and our family there was another layer of disruption that was deeply personal and painful. Many people undoubtedly had multiple layers of disruption going on in many areas of their lives as well.
I got clearer vision, it just didn’t look like the “20/20 vision” I imagined
I was struck by the fact that God was answering my prayer for 20/20 vision. Just about everything in our lives got shaken. When there is a good solid shaking in your life all the loose branches fall off. And only what is solid remains. The end result is great, but the process is not so great. However, no matter how difficult, painful, and humiliating 2020 was, the fruit of a deep pruning is bearing fruit.
In Song of Solomon, the bride makes a bold statement and she says SOS 1:4, draw me away and we will run after you. The bride is saying she is committed to staying in the place of intimacy and communion with the Lord while staying in community and going after the Lord. Many times this year I have wanted to crawl away and hide and avoid people to protect myself. That’s ok for a minute but not for the long haul.
Time for a new perspective
Later in the Song of Solomon, the Lord speaks to the bride about the coming harvest or the future fruit and he reminds her that the winter is past and the figs are in season, etc. He’s encouraging her to see past what she currently sees to get a different perspective. I believe the Lord has been trying to lift my head to see my life from a different perspective to gain hope in His leadership.
I don’t believe I have perfect vision, but I believe it’s getting clearer. He has been answering my prayer for 20/20 vision by shaking off the things that have blocked my view. I have hope for 2021, I have hope that I will have even more communion with God and that He will continue to mature me.
What has the Lord done in your life this year? In what areas have you grown stronger in your faith? What regrets do you need to burn and then hand over the ashes and receive beauty, which is His mercy?
One Response
Dear Jennifer and Dwayne!
I want to thank you, guys! I have also been deeply shaken this year, bus as in other seasons of my life our Lord used you’re life and ministry to talk to me. This time in a deeper way! Thank you for disposition in serving the Lord! You’re a blessing to me! I am praying for you, guys!
May the Lord bless and strengthen you in this new year!
Love,
Aline Gomes